Another one-hour special! This was written on a programme called Scrivener, and when I was writing it, I copy and pasted emoji in it. Worked well. When I copy and pasted the story into wordpress… they all disappeared. So just so you know, there were loads of emoji. It was very colourful. And if someone replies and here’s no writing, that was an emoji.
‘Mortal’ means ‘really really really drunk’ up in the North East. I don’t come from the north east, but it was the first thing that came to mind when given the spark word.
Also, I took major liberties with grammar and spelling. The computer did its best to reinstate capital letters and apostrophes and whatnot, but it is actually meant to be written wrongly, if that makes sense. I have no idea how da yoof text each other; I am seriously uncool, and used to use correct punctuation when I had my Nokia 5110.
Anyway, here is Mortal.
Girl’s on the Lose!
Thursday 11th June
Staceeeeey: rite lads, whos up for getting mortal tomoro. been to long!
Mel: well up for it lol
Becca: wheres gud these day’s
Staceeeeeey: waikiki is open now, got new drink’s
Lady V: all I’m interested in!! Lol
Staceeeeeey: sat at 9 ok? x
Mel: brill, c u then
Friday 12th June
Staceeeeey: Just checkin………. We all gud for gettin mortal tomoz?
Becca: HE’LL YEAH
Lady V: even washed my pulling pants lol
Mel: do they work??????
Staceeeeey: no lol x
Lady V: yes they do
Staceeeeey: They mite work bettr if u didnt wash them…… if u see what I mean!
Lady V: u wait and see
Saturday 13th June
Becca: getting mortal later lads!
Lady V: pants all ready on lol
Becca: leg’s shaved?
Lady V: got a brazziliun!
Staceeeeeeey: rite the plan…………… meet at waikiki at 9, get right mortal an sleep all sunday !x
Mel: sounds like a planx
Sunday 14th June
Staceeeeeeeey: kno the feeling lol
Becca: im never drinking agen
Staceeeeeeeey: was a gud nite tho
Becca: cant beleve the pulling pants worked vix
Becca: oi vix
Becca: victorrrrrrriaaaaaa lol r u there
Mel: shes prolly still busy
Monday 15th June
Mel: any1 herd from vix yday
Becca: nope lol prolly still getting it on
Mel: really tho, any1 herd from her?shes ment 2 be in today
Becca: in where lol
Staceeeeeeeey: in her new lads pant’s
Mel: in work
Becca: prolly pulled a sickie
Staceeeeeeey: shes dun it loads of time’s before
Staceeeeeeey: dont wurry about it
Tuesday 16th June
Becca: vix get yo lazzzzy ass into work were all getting a bollickin for lieing for u yestday
Becca: wat r u doin????????????
Staceeeeeeey: stop dicking us around vix
Staceeeeeeey: uve made melanie cry
Becca: wen she gets out from under her guy shes going 2 have sooooo many messages!
Mel: no im getting really worried guys
Mel: we shudnt joke
Mel: she mite be sick
Becca: yeh, haveing to much sex disease
Becca: she is
Mel: just rung her mum..they avnt herd from her
Staceeeeeeeey: tipical slag
Mel: gotta bad feeling
Wednesday 17th June
Mel: made new group lads
Mel invited you to join ‘RIP LADY V’
RIP LADY V
Mel: rip vix
Mel: miss u
Staceeeeeeey: cant beleve he did that too her
Becca: the 1 time her pulling pant’s work,,,,, an he turn’s out to be a psycho!!!!!
Mel: that’s not funny becca
Becca: lighten up melanie
Staceeeeeeeey: its a JOKE mel
Mel: she was strangled by her pants……… i dont think its funny
Becca: was r the plans for her funeral
Staceeeeeeeey: going 2 get proper mortal